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Village barber buys electric shaver, government claims village has been successfully electrified

The 67 years long wait to get electricity in this Uttar Pradesh village could get longer as the village has been marked as “electrified” by some babus after local barber Raju bought an electric shaver.

Raju, who has been using the good old pair of scissors and ustara blades, bought a Philips Aquatouch to show off among his peers, but little did he know that this will switch off any chances of electricity coming to his village.

“Actually the electric shaver was gifted to me by my friend who came just yesterday from the city, I don’t have money to buy such modern gadgets and never thought there could be a shaver that is operated by electricity,” Raju later claimed, “And I didn’t get it to show off. I simply wanted to put an end to this bloodshed.”

“I mean nick and cuts that people get during shaving, resulting in blood coming out of one’s face, else the law and order situation is all good here; only a few thieves. In fact, policemen are rare species in our village,” Raju quickly clarified about the “bloodshed”.

Sources say that Raju is deliberately trying to hide the fact that he bought the Philips Aquatouch from his own savings, lest the government babus declare the entire village as prosperous and much above poverty line.

“If they can claim electricity reaching villages due to this electric shaver, they can surely declare the entire village socially forward and prosperous due to presence of a modern gadget!” the village sarpanch claimed.

When contacted, the government babus refused to comment, but they confessed that they had marked Daadhipur as electrified due to presence of the electric shaver. They have discounted the absence of electric poles and transformers as proof to the contrary.

“Bhai, we too have targets to meet. People keep complaining that we make tall promises during elections and then later on we forget to keep those promises. Last elections we said that we would electrify the entire village. Now with this new electric shaver we have a face saver and we can pass it off as development work. You see, we need to show development, even if it remains on papers,” a senior bureaucrat in Lucknow said candidly, “And the village will get electricity. Now that they have got the shaver, they will want to charge its battery. kuchh jugaad kar lenge log.”

And it appears that the administration’s faith in local jugaad is not misplaced. The latest reports suggest Daadhipur is going gaga over the electric shaver. Villagers have been thronging to Raju’s shop to have a look at the electric shaver.

“There has been over 81% increase in clean shaven youth since the Aquatouch arrived in our village,” claimed a local journalist who also doubles up as expert on everything, “Raju’s monthly income has gone up by 223%, while sale of anti-septic creams and ointments have gone down.”

According the latest reports coming in, Raju is now on prime time TV:

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